DANCING IN THE VALLEY Rose Booth

[00:00:22] Today on the AMPD UP211 Podcast, Rose Booth, Rose is an author, podcaster and above the knee amputee. In her very first book, Rose shares her unbelievable life story of facing death numerous times, doubting her faith and rising from the depths of despair. The book is called

[00:00:43] Dancing in the Valley, finding life and joy amidst the shadow of death, nipping at her heels. Rose became an amputee in December of 2021 and continues to inspire through public speaking, advocacy and her work in the women's ministry of her church. It is our pleasure to introduce today

[00:01:04] to the show. Rose Booth. Hey Rose, good to see you. Welcome to the show. Thanks Rick. Thanks for having me. Oh, it's our pleasure. I'm so glad you could spend the time with us today. I've been reading

[00:01:24] up on you and I have lots of questions but I promise that won't be too painful. That's fine. Certainly not as painful as what I consider to be in your case a little bit

[00:01:43] of a recent event is your amputation. You're somewhat of a newer amputee so you bring a very interesting perspective to this particular platform. So whenever I meet newer amputee, let's say

[00:02:01] anywhere from let's say a year to like three years into their journey, I am all full of questions. I like to do a lot of comparisons to my own journey back then when I first started all this stuff.

[00:02:18] Is there anything you would say giving your experience at this point that really surprised you? Something that surprised you most about losing a limb? I think what surprised me the most is

[00:02:33] that I couldn't just get a prosthetic and start walking. So I'm in above knee and feet and I'm in also a tribe, I think I'm an overachiever, I try to be. And so I really didn't think

[00:02:52] much about just getting a prosthetic, I figured I would go through therapy and I would just start walking again, you know, no issues. Maybe even walking better than before but that definitely wasn't

[00:03:06] the case. Yeah I would agree with you very often many people that never experienced limb loss think it's a plug-in place situation where you take away one limb and then you just attach another not really understanding that it's incredibly difficult sort of calculus that goes into

[00:03:29] getting used to even donning a prosthesis, let alone walking. I mean very often running, jumping, doing all kinds of physical activities and I would say for myself personally, it probably took about two years before I could actually don a prosthesis and somewhat comfortably

[00:03:55] but I'm about six, seven years into my journey now and I would say I'm finally getting to be the most active I've ever been not only as an amputee but also as an adult so it's it's a long, long

[00:04:14] process and certainly there's many challenges you know along the way but I certainly appreciate that sentiment because most people do think it's just a simple thing and it really isn't, you know. Yeah we've got quite a few challenges in there. What were the circumstances that led

[00:04:41] to your particular amputation? I know you said you're above the knee so can you walk us through that? Certainly, so it all started November of 2019. I was severely in a lot of pain in my right hip

[00:04:58] and ended up going to the ER and discovered I was septic. So for lack of given you the full story it was septic arthritis and I have had rheumatoid arthritis since I was 28 and so I've been

[00:05:18] dealing with that limitation but when this happened in November of 2019 it started a journey of 14 surgeries, three times facing death, two heart cast heart attack more than a year in the hospital and rehabs and then eventually losing my right leg above my knee. Essentially I had a hip

[00:05:48] of place where I had a knee replacement and what happened after the knee replacement I was doing great and had an accident at the rehab facility and tore the batel attendant and then it never

[00:06:02] truly would heal properly and so I have contracted infection and then because of the muscle was torn it just couldn't keep the incision together and so because of that there really wasn't anything

[00:06:22] else to do but to appetite and during that time I also turned septic and coated and there were just a whole lot of issues around the amputation but so in December we actually knew as Eve of 2021

[00:06:40] I had my imputation. And going through those trials and I've ridden this roller coaster myself on McKinney Transplant recipient I am a heart valve replacement patient obviously an MPT just like yourself. I understand this roller coaster, this okay we're hoping this surgery is going to work

[00:07:08] then there's the recovery and then there's a setback so it's kind of like you know and then it just repeats and it repeats and you can reach a place very often where you're sort of faced with the

[00:07:25] idea of like is this it? Is this what the end is supposed to feel like? Is this what just happens when people get sick? Is this the path that we all sort of walk down in our ending days and

[00:07:46] you're obviously not that person and I don't mean in the sense that you didn't take that journey but you didn't succumb to that because you're here you're you're thriving in many respects

[00:07:59] you mentioned during over a cheever so I'm sure that played a role but in those in those darkest hours and I've been there myself when when we're at the hospital let's say we're alone

[00:08:11] and we're just you know with our own thoughts what's the place that you go to as a person in those moments? So for me I'm a follower of Christ so my faith is extremely important to me

[00:08:30] and I won't lie by saying that you know our all these was strong in my faith through this journey. I hit the pit I went it was in the pit often and many times it was hard for me to even pray or

[00:08:51] or looked at him for my strength but I had a great support group of people around me praying for me and I could definitely tell that made a huge difference. I also felt like you know part of

[00:09:08] part of my testimony is you know I used to be a Christian colleague Anna and when all this happened I really believe that there there had to be a quote-unciferating you know I've served the Lord

[00:09:24] majority of my life I had a great life when all this hit me and I thought you know I'm only going to suffer a certain amount of time but that's not really the case there is no quote-unciferating

[00:09:38] no matter who you are. So I battled a lot with depression and sadness just at the loss of not only my leg but my life and I really you know in the beginning of this journey when you talk about setbacks

[00:09:56] the setbacks were big at certain times but you know I was again being that Pauli and I thought that's great you know it's okay we're going to get through this it's going to be great

[00:10:07] and then you just kept getting hit hit after hit after hit as you talk about and you know you begin to even the most resilient person struggles and a lot of what got me through I mean really what

[00:10:21] got me through with Jesus but what got me through was knowing that I'm a living testimony of what he's doing in my life and even though I was battling some of this journey literally

[00:10:38] my flesh wanted to just walk away from the Lord saying I'm done like I'm done but I knew this was this was what I needed to do the Lord was with me and I needed to be faithful to that and I wanted

[00:10:52] to have a story and I want to people to see that it hasn't really matter how difficult life can get. The Lord is always with you and because I trusted him completely and really it was

[00:11:09] an until two years and that really certainner everything I would have had a lot of control over what I wanted I wanted to get back to my life and then finally about two years in almost I just had

[00:11:23] to pray a prayer surrender and say I'm done Lord and I'm tired of trying to control this I've got to take what you have for me and that really started the worst three months in this journey

[00:11:36] which ended me losing my leg and it got to the point before my amputation right before the week of when I coded I had told everyone I was ready to go to Jesus I was done I wanted to go and

[00:11:50] and after the infutation and I fought back I really went through a lot of grief but also I was ready to go to heaven I was ready to be done with this earth but God had other plans and

[00:12:07] that was hard because I was ready to go and so at my lowest physically I had to fight back through yeah yeah I was gonna say don't don't you feel and I felt this way because you mentioned your

[00:12:25] support system I think one of the most painful things for me when I was ill for a number of years was the pain and suffering that I was witnessing around me seeing the people that were close to me

[00:12:44] worried seeing the people that were close to me becoming deeply emotional and struggling with to be quite honest at times struggling to even come and see me because that in itself

[00:13:04] was very hard for them because when we when we love someone we never want to see them in pain and you know we we tend most of us that are deeply compassionate and maybe can't stomach

[00:13:19] at all that well tend to look away and say I just can't you know I can't process this this is too hard I had very very close friends you know lifelong close friends it did not come see me

[00:13:32] you know and and it wasn't really even shocking in the sense of well you know they don't care about me or why why wouldn't they be there for me I knew that they couldn't handle it they couldn't

[00:13:47] handle the idea that someone they deeply cared about was maybe getting ready to leave this place and that was very very difficult however you you you know you can find that some beautiful relationships friendships support systems will come to surface in those darkest

[00:14:14] moments and that can be sort of a retool and refuel of the joy and the ambition and drive to stay here and and to say well you know in your case maybe my faith is showing me that

[00:14:34] life is worth living I need to stay I need to to do all of these other things that I just haven't had a chance to do yet and to me you know what you've done post-op

[00:14:49] as far and I know you've been through what more surgeries and you'd probably like then you'd like to count but you know given you know where you're at now it's fantastic to see

[00:15:05] you engaging all of these other things that you not only you love but that that you can tell your story you know to the world I want to get the excuse me I want to get the

[00:15:21] the name of the book correct I don't want to screw this up so dancing in the valley finding life and joy amidst the shadow of death nipping at her heels that's a lot

[00:15:39] that is a lot right there when when I see that rose I think okay this is this this is going to be interesting so obviously highly anticipated book that is I believe is being released December 1st

[00:15:57] correct that is correct yes yes okay so December 1st so this podcast will actually air before the release of your your book so I'm excited about that so mark it on your calendars

[00:16:13] December 1st rose booth her book is going to be out available I'm assuming all platforms is it through Amazon through everywhere you'll be able to get your hands on it correct yes it's right

[00:16:28] Amazon Barnes and Noble all the general suspects okay fantastic I'm curious because I do a bit of writing myself had you always been some somewhat of either a bookworm or an aspiring writer or was this something that just came from your experiences you know facing the challenges you

[00:16:53] have and coming so near death it definitely has been a dream of mine to write a book for quite a few years probably 16 17 years I want to write a book I don't know if you're familiar

[00:17:10] with the movie Mr. Helen's opus we it's an older actress of course yeah yeah so the movie premise is that Mr. Holland has to deal with life and so he never gets to write his opus

[00:17:27] and he's teaching kids and taking care of a deaf son and all those things the people haven't seen it they need to go back watch it it's got a great ending but that was me like I had like

[00:17:39] was going on and I just had an opportunity to invest the time and writing a book and it takes a lot of time didn't really know where to start and so I ended up right before I or in the midst of when

[00:17:54] I started this journey I came across a literary agent who I followed for years joy read joy egregious read and she was going to do a writing cohort that would help people to come in on the

[00:18:09] other side of the book proposal so I tried doing that in March of 2021 and that's when the accident happened with up to lieutenant so said hey can I just could I do it in another time

[00:18:23] sure it's so October of 2021 I was set to go but all my materials ready roll it's a 30 day thing and that's when I ended up back in the hospital before the last three months before last but like

[00:18:38] so finally when I got out may of 2022 I went through the cohort and came out with a proposal and I say this about a lot of things in my lives but I really feel like that the Lord allowed

[00:18:54] this to happen to make all my dreams come true so I always wanted to write a book and I'm dead not I've always wanted to be a radio talk show host when I I co-host a podcast

[00:19:10] and I always wanted to do more work in the church serving my church more and I'm doing that so because I loved my life before I had a full-time job more than full-time working 50 hours a week or more

[00:19:24] managing a team I love doing what I loved but that was all consuming and so now that I'm really not able to work full-time due to the kind of the hit my body took in the

[00:19:39] invitation and the RA and all of that these are the things I'm doing and they're very fulfilling and they're great but I was a bookworm as a child was on my newspaper staff in high school

[00:19:56] and really loved to write and began a blog in 2005 and I really said oh gosh you need to write a book and I couldn't decide on what to write it on or I had six different ideas that know which one

[00:20:10] to go with and that all of this happened in here I am. Yeah so where I get even more curious is in terms of writing process because you know I again have done some writing and I'm actually in the

[00:20:29] midst of working with a publisher on a young adult fiction story and I got to tell you there are times where I just I mean there are days when I'm ready to write and everything's flowing

[00:20:47] but there are other days where it's it's just it's like pulling teeth I mean to get ideas on paper and to feel is somewhat confident that it has some kind of cohesion

[00:21:03] what is your I mean what's your process I mean I know every writer is a little bit different but I'm curious to know do you hit those stumbling blocks and how do you overcome those?

[00:21:20] Definitely I think being a writer being an author you do it in a vacuum you you're basically sort of a I think a lot of times introverts even struggle but it is somewhat of an introvert type

[00:21:36] of a job you research depending on what you're writing you know you might have to research which takes a lot of time you've got to think a lot and then you have days where just like you said

[00:21:51] you can sit down and just blow it out and then there are other days when you just can't for the life of you write anything so I would say for me with this for me with this story it's my story it's my

[00:22:06] life story and it tells majority of the book does concentrate on the year 2019 through 2022 but I tell my whole life story but concentrating on those times that are difficult that were hard

[00:22:25] that was very difficult for me I would have to take breaks because not only it's not so much that the ideas didn't flow but that it was too traumatic sometimes to recount all of that

[00:22:39] it's therapeutic in on some days and traumatic on others so a lot of times I would have take some pretty big breaks in the between but I would say that one of the things that I use when

[00:22:51] I'm sort of stuck and that's I've got other book ideas and already thinking ahead about those but in general if I'm thinking about it you know writing and I'm stuck typically what I do

[00:23:04] is I just take a break and I give myself that grace to do that but I usually my mind is always thinking and so I try to let my mind sort of absorb things in my day and use it to process a lot in my

[00:23:22] mind on structure and outline I visualized it in my mind first and then I can sit down and write and typically if I just let my mind sort of be creative without sitting in front of the computer

[00:23:37] I think that really helps. Because I think the pressure of sitting down in front of your keyboard can stunt your creativity so a lot of times that's what will help me is just to walk away from

[00:23:51] the keyboard or in my case real away from the keyboard and yeah right let just live life for a while and let my mind sort of process what my next my next words need to be for the page.

[00:24:07] Yeah I think that's really good advice because I've done that myself sometimes I feel like sitting at the keyboard there's this pressure like this performance type pressure of I have to you know

[00:24:19] I have to come up with these really interesting ideas right now and very often I will I'll step away I'll let that process a bit give my my brain a chance to breathe and then suddenly

[00:24:34] I'll get an idea and think okay here it comes now it's time the thing I was also really surprised by was just the volume I mean maybe my my grammar just stinks but just just the volume of self-addeding

[00:24:50] I've had to do where I will sort of riff and jam and just be cranking away all these ideas are sort of you know kind of getting splashed on to a page go back and think oh my gosh what is this like

[00:25:07] what am I trying to say right now because none of this makes any sense to me and I was the one that wrote it I'm thinking what on earth what was I in drugs this day like what was I doing you know

[00:25:22] the whole thing is a strange go that's really interesting so when I've done the very same thing I've gone through I've written it all down but I'll go back typically I would write chapter the chapter and then I go back and

[00:25:38] read through and I'd be like what in the world is that you know and then I would read completely these stuff but when I'm back to the publishing process and becoming an animanious script you know

[00:25:50] then you start with I had a developmental editor who went through to sort of read it from a developmental standpoint and then there were lots of edits then I went through a copy at its stage where

[00:26:00] the copy editor may changes and then I had a couple of friends read the draft before we were now excuse you were now finalizing the type setting ready for the upload and so I had a couple

[00:26:15] friends read through it and again I'm like what am I I got to the stage of have I maybe I shouldn't be writing like the amount of corrections and changes but you know I think I actually enjoy the editing

[00:26:31] process and I think that's a little different than most writers most writers I think like to just get it on the page and be done and move on their editing process can be it's it is it's very arduous

[00:26:45] but it does make your work better and so I try to look at it what I do when you've done where I've read something like oh what am I thinking I just think about it as just a piece of pottery

[00:26:56] that it or an art piece that you're continually tweaking to make it the best we can make it yeah molding and shaping what are you given everything that you've put into this and I'm just

[00:27:09] so excited to read it what would you say you want people that dive into this and absorb it consume it let's say what do you want them to take away from the book I think my my overarching

[00:27:32] take away from this would be that which has been but was my mantra through this God is faithful always God is always good and he is always right so that's the overarching thing I want people to leave with no

[00:27:50] matter what you go through in life you've got to remember those three things I think one of the motivations of writing this book was I had I have read a lot of books that tell a story a tragic

[00:28:08] tale of suffering or loss or whatever it might be and it showed people who really never wavered and were very strong and are faith strong be the process and maybe even people who've

[00:28:23] gone on come out on the other side saying it's great you know life is good and all of this and to me that to me I'm like that that's not reality for everybody. I mean you mentioned Rick how you

[00:28:38] you're you're what six years down the road and you're just now saying I'm probably the most active of being and that that's that's reality right so I wanted to present a picture of reality

[00:28:54] but a survival and not a picture that it's candy coated with no matter how many hits I got I've never gave up my faithful word I've never struggled I've never know that's not true and

[00:29:10] if you are a believer if you follow Christ one of the things that you may believe is that if I hit a rocky road you know I'm gonna get through this because I'm a Christian or I follow Jesus

[00:29:23] well you're gonna get through it but how you get through that is going to be where your foundation is found and it doesn't mean you're not gonna wrestle with that faith. All through scripture

[00:29:36] you see people who wrestled with their faith and we don't portray those pictures in our books that we write I feel like many just show the candy coated picture one of the great one of the

[00:29:52] greatest books I've read from someone who went through a tragic life and tragic story obviously is Johnny Erickson Taada who became a quadriplegic at 17 or 18 more recently a book called Hopials is by a woman who at 28 separate I'm aneurysm that she didn't take in her life

[00:30:17] she had a six-month-old child and she tells the story and it is not all well they pops in roses and I appreciate that because it that book really spoke to me years before I even went through this

[00:30:31] because it was real and you know it's great to hear the success stories of people who come on the other side and how things are good for them right now but I hope this speaks to people who

[00:30:45] might be in the midst of some sort of struggle to know that yes you need to hang on but you can wrestle in this journey and that's okay. I think those are really really important words especially for

[00:31:02] this community that you are now a member of of Lin Lawson Lim difference becoming an MPT can be not only sobering but also it is one of those things where you can begin to track

[00:31:19] some of the dysfunction amongst MPTs and the perceptions with MPTs you know one of the things that we we focus on here at the show is to bring MPTs into the spotlight of all backgrounds,

[00:31:36] of all fitness levels, of all skill sets we tend to at least myself I tend to see MPTs in two camps usually there is the very glamorous camp of MPTs these are the people in

[00:31:58] the commercials and the advertisements they're strong and they're lean and they're doing all these amazing things and they're par Olympic athletes and this and that and that's great it's beautiful and it's flashy and sexy in all those cool things however there is another group of MPTs

[00:32:19] I consider myself in the other group which is we are just everyday people we go to work we pursue friendships and relationships we are part of other communities and we pursue our passions

[00:32:34] and we bring something to this particular universe that is just as relevant and just as important as anyone that has an endorsement deal let's put it that way so when I look at your yourself

[00:32:53] and I see what you're doing just a couple years after going through usually usually what will pretty much not someone completely off their access, off their access part of me and they're kind

[00:33:08] of done with with any sort of pursuit any sort of passion we see MPTs going into a very very dark space they don't want to engage any longer to them life is sort of over to see what you're doing

[00:33:29] is very very inspiring and it brings it brings to the community and I hope our listeners that sense of hope that no matter what age you are or your background, social economic situation

[00:33:48] whatever fitness level you're at losing a limb does not mean in any way shape or form well your life's over and in fact I believe it's just beginning the new chapter no pun intended is is just beginning and you know you you are a living testament to that

[00:34:11] and I so I so appreciate your courage and you wanting to document your journey in a very very dark time of your life and to be quite honest I can say that because I personally

[00:34:29] have not gone there myself I I haven't chosen to put all those words down and to document all those feelings and you know to to relive some of those traumatic moments and I mean you said

[00:34:45] it yourself you'd have to step away from it and try to come up for air before before you dive back into it again so I mean that that's you know I mean if you're not inspired by that I don't know

[00:35:02] if there's anything else that's gonna inspire you because that's that's really something um you know how how would someone if they wanted to speak to you reach out to you get any kind of

[00:35:15] guidance how do you prefer they do that with you so the best of the reach me would be through my website it's very simply Rose Booth.net there is a place there for contacting me for asking anything

[00:35:32] a couple different places that's probably the first the first area to find me I have a blog there which is a little neglected since I've been writing the book but I try to keep that going I have

[00:35:48] a newsletter that I ask people to subscribe to they keep up with my publishing journey and just let my life journey um you can also find the podcast there which is one single thought I co-host with

[00:36:02] my friend Heather Booth you can find that on any podcast provider catcher so those are probably the best the best ways to get a hold of me and um yeah and I do some speaking I'm not really traveling

[00:36:21] outside of the regional area I live in the mobile Kentucky but I'm very open to any sort of virtual meetups with uh in a group or individuals and and happy to do any sort of

[00:36:36] a virtual speaking opportunity. But I have to also want to add Rick I love what you said about you know the two camps of FETs that's so insightful and I really think that's something that's

[00:36:52] valuable that I think your listeners really should take part when they think about where they are as an FET because I think sometimes you know those who aren't in this community don't really understand because maybe who they see are these influencers and people with endorsements in the

[00:37:11] glamorous group what they don't see is what they deal with but they don't show and what we deal with which is we have to do everything different from taking a shower to cooking a meal to to

[00:37:26] navigating a world that doesn't have automatic doors or uh ramps to get in places whatever that looks like and I really feel like that is I don't want to call it the secret life of an FET

[00:37:41] but those are things you're not going to put out on social media. In fact I've even asked some of those what I would consider glamorous members of that community if they would show how they get

[00:37:56] around and do everyday life and they sort of don't respond because I don't think they want to show that and I you know that's I don't know that I want to show that but I think it's something that the

[00:38:08] world needs to know but it is not all glamorous even if you are glamorous remember the community. No I couldn't agree with you more and so much of my focus not only in the advocacy piece

[00:38:22] but also the normalization of what we go through the normalization of the amputee lifestyle and that yeah we do things differently but in a lot of ways this is just the circumstance that

[00:38:38] we have to adapt to and you know we don't come out of surgery and they hand us a really cool running blade and say yeah you'll be running tomorrow um it just doesn't yeah it just doesn't work

[00:38:52] that way and there and there tends to be some misperceptions that uh you know this this whole thing is just you know really easy and it's just not so you know I appreciate you touching that again

[00:39:12] and we all look so forward to the book on December 1st and if anyone wants to reach out to you please it's rose booth dot net correct correct rose booth dot net and there's lots of ways to

[00:39:29] reach out to me through the website yeah so so please do so uh Ruth uh Rose pardon me um i'm getting tongue tied now um listen right that happens all the time because people think them are

[00:39:46] first and last thing together and they call me Ruth yeah because it's booth yeah it's rose and booth and then you combine it and go Ruth yeah exactly the one thing I can't let you go I was

[00:39:58] about to wrap up the and it just popped into my head the one thing that I read that I found I was just tickled by as you I know you can ready see it coming um yeah John Wilkes booth

[00:40:13] this is a distant relative of yours correct he is yes he is that's extraordinary that yeah go ahead explain this correlation yeah so I don't know exactly all the steps I've tried doing it through ancestors because I have I have done my treat the

[00:40:37] ancestry but my dad's oldest sister years ago did a deep dive family tree way before you had the internet to trace back to um John Wilkes booth and actually did so I think I like to always

[00:40:56] add to that but I'm also a that means I'm also part of a family of actors so that's a positive even though he was a presidential assassin his brother Edwin and himself John Wilkes were

[00:41:12] well known actors and their dad genius was a well known actor so there's a bufeteer I believe in New York that was named after the family and so I like to focus on those positives of that part

[00:41:27] of the family but yeah sure because the immediate association is you're related to someone who killed Abraham Lincoln you know and that's only one part of the story and I had done some research

[00:41:42] on John Wilkes booth as well and yeah there's a rich history there in in terms of you know what he came from and and being an actor and everything else so I find that those little tidbits are just

[00:41:57] fascinating to me historically and I I appreciate your research into that and um but anyway I didn't necessarily want to end on that note but it just it literally just popped into my head

[00:42:11] right as I was getting ready to sign off well I will say we're too rich you know there's always when we think about any mutation we like to believe that there's something good that's going to come

[00:42:23] from our little box and in John Wilkes' re-situation the secret service was born because of John Wilkes' be so our president our presidents are now protected for life because of the action

[00:42:38] of John Wilkes' be so there are some good things that come from the back there are I would I would agree Rose I appreciate you being here today it's been a fascinating interview I hope we can

[00:42:53] have you again after the book is on the best side of the list and yeah and and yeah I so appreciate what you bring to this growing community and I'm so excited for people to listen in and learn more

[00:43:11] about you Rose Booth thanks again I'm Rick Bonkowski this is the Amped up to 11 podcast and I want to wish everyone health and happiness and we'll see you next time